I Never
by Silver Dragon of the Storm
Summary: Booze, everybody likes it, right? Well, Gojyo, Goku, Sanzo and Hakkai have fun with it when they play a drinking game. Rated for beer, some language... I think...


Silver Dragon: Hello, this is my first Saiyuki fic.. Anyway, if you find any spelling mistakes with favourite and any other words that shouldn't have 'u' in it... It is because I'm Canadian, and I spell like that, so leave me alone.

Disclaimer: I own nothing... Fudge...

I Never

It was dark the inn room then the door burst open. Four figures slumped in, well actually two slumped in and two walked in normally. One of the non-slumping figures carried their luggage and put it against the wall opposite of the door, then sat down on a bed. The two slumping figures took the beds on the same side of the room. The other non-slumping figure turned on the light.

Scarlet eyes snapped shut. "Uh… Damn it Sanzo, warn me when you're going to do that" muttered Gojyo.

"Hn" Sanzo replied with much vigor, that a berserker would go green with envy.

"I'm bored… And hungry," Goku whined.

"Baka saru," Gojyo muttered. "If I weren't so tired I would hit you."

"I'm not a monkey!"

"Would anyone like to play a game of cards?" said the green eyed non-slumping figure that had carried in the luggage.

"No, you always win them anyway Hakkai" said Gojyo, searching his vest for his cigarettes.

Hakkai blinked a couple of times, thinking back, then his ever present smile grew wider. "You're right Gojyo, I have won every game."

"You didn't know!" Goku exclaimed.

"Um… Maybe?" Hakkai laughed, scratching the back of his head.

"Well, I'm still bored," Goku repeated.

Gojyo was quiet up until now, thinking. "Hey I have a fun idea, why don't we play a game of 'I Never'."

"What's 'I Never'?" asked Goku, his curiosity getting the better of him…… Again.

"Oh Gojyo, that's not a good idea," cautioned Hakkai, remembering what 'I Never' was.

"Come on Hakkai, a little alcohol never hurt anyone."

"What's 'I Never' you ero-kappa!" Goku almost yelled, He really disliked it when people talked about stuff without telling him.

"It's a drinking game," answered Gojyo. He stood up and went to his bag. He pulled out a pack of beers and sat down in the middle of the room. "Come on, if you want to know how to play come and sit down."

Goku came and sat down on the right side of Gojyo, his curiosity consuming him. Hakkai sighed in defeat and sat on the left side of Gojyo.

"I am not joining in your stupid game," Sanzo growled, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Come on Sanzo!" Goku whined. "Don't be a big meanie."

"Yes, come and join us," Hakkai encouraged. "It's no fun without you."

"You'll get beer," Gojyo added for good measure.

"Damn you baka saru, pervert, Hakkai" grumbled Sanzo as he sat down between Goku and Hakkai, across from Gojyo.

"Good, now that we're all sitting down," Gojyo said. "'I Never' is a drinking game. It's kinda difficult to explain so I'll just do an example."

Gojyo passed out a beer to each of them then opened his own.

"You say 'I never' something then whoever has takes a sip of their beer," Gojyo explained. "Here, for example, um…. I've never in the same bed with another guy. Then anyone who has would take a sip."

"I get it!" said Goku, excited that he would be able to drink even if he was underage.

"Perhaps we should get another drink for Goku, that's not alcoholic…" Hakkai started to say.

"Awww! Come on Hakkai, don't become another big meanie like Sanzo!" cried Goku, turning on his Big Golden Puppy Eyes of Doom TM.

"Okay, okay" Hakkai said, foiling under Goku's golden gaze.

"Our order will be myself, Goku, Sanzo, and Hakkai, got it?" asked Gojyo.

"Yep!"

"Hn"

"Yes"

"Great, I've never…" Gojyo said, thinking. "…… Killed a thousand demons."

Hakkai's smile was replaced by one of his rare frowns. He glared at Gojyo. "Cheap shot," he muttered taking a sip, then all the gloominess disappeared and was replaced by his smile once more.

"It's my turn right?" asked Goku, Gojyo nodded. "Hmm… I never smoked before."

Gojyo and Sanzo, who had to take out his cigarette before, took a sip.

"I've never practiced any sort of religion," said Sanzo. Hakkai took a sip.

"The sisters at the orphanage were Catholic, so I'm Catholic," Hakkai answered the priest's, heretic's, and half-breed's questioning glances. "Now to get back at you, Gojyo. I never had my mother attempt to kill me."

"Ouch," said Gojyo, flinching, then he took a sip of his drink. "I never had someone extremely close to me die." Hakkai looked sad while Sanzo's expression stayed neutral as they both took sips.

"I don't believe I have to explain myself," said Sanzo, remembering how his master saved him from the demons by taking the hits.

"Kanan……" Hakkai muttered, closing his eyes in remembrance.

(Hakkai Flashback, which are usually bloody)

"_Kanan? Are you here?"_

"_Gonou, is that you?"_

His old name…

"_You're alive! I'm so sorry, Kanan! For everything!"_

"…"

"_Let's go home okay, Kanan? I promise I'll protect you."_

"_It's too late. All right?"_

_She slowly reached for his blade._

"_What are you-"_

"_I'm carrying his child. The spawn of that Beast is resting in my belly." She took the sheath off. "That's why… Goodbye Gonou."_

_The blade came down in an arch and then her blood was everywhere._

"_KANAN!"_

(End Flashback, see I told you it would be)

"Oi, Hakkai? You okay?" said Gojyo, waving a hand in front of his face. "You kinda spaced out on us."

"It's okay, I'm fine."

"You sure?"

Hakkai looked around to see that even Sanzo having concern in his eyes. Hakkai smiled. "Positive, whose turn is it?"

"Yours" replied Goku.

"Okay…… I never knew my parents" said Hakkai. Gojyo took a sip.

"I have never not hooked up with a woman" Gojyo said, smirking. "Though my conquests have been postponed because of you homos, I'm not talking about you Hakkai."

"Well that's nice" Hakkai answered.

"Watch it" muttered Sanzo, as he and Goku took sips.

"I'm surprised monkey boy hasn't passed out yet" said Gojyo staring at the slightly swaying Goku.

"I'm not a monkey!"

Goku shook his head trying to clear his mind of the alcohol that was fogging it up.

"I… Uh… Never had any other best friends than you guys," Goku said. Nobody took sips.

"There was my brother but I don't think he really counts," Gojyo said.

"I really wasn't entirely friendly in the orphanage, and Kanan was my fiancée," Hakkai explained.

"Everyone at the temple was older then me, and anyway who would want to get aquatinted with those idiots," said Sanzo. "I've never fought with a blade." Gojyo and Hakkai took sips.

"I never had any siblings" said Hakkai. Gojyo took a sip.

"I never fell in love before," said Gojyo, Hakkai took a sip.

"Surprisingly, seeing how many women you go through," Sanzo said. "Flirting, dating, sleepin-"

"Okay, okay! I get it!" Gojyo said, then he smirked. "If I didn't know any better I'd think that his Holiness is jealous."

"Why would I be jealous of you?"

"'Cause you can't get any."

"WHY YOU!"

Sanzo had his gun out and trained on Gojyo before anyone had time to react.

"Say that again to my face."

"Now, now. Everyone calm down," Hakkai interjected. "I'm sure Gojyo didn't mean it."

"Yes I did"

BAM!

"Okay! I didn't I was just joking." Gojyo stared at the bullet hole extremely close to his leg.

"Better," replied Sanzo, putting his pistol away and sitting back down.

"Damn cranky priest…" Gojyo muttered to himself.

After much questioning and drinking later they were all at least on their sixth or seventh can of beer.

"I… Uh… I" Goku struggled to say. He was drunk; he swayed from side to side. Until his head hit the floorboards a moment later.

"Well, he's out like a light," said Gojyo, he was only slightly drunk.

"Maybe we should put him to bed" murmured Hakkai, putting down his can and got ready to get up. He wasn't even close to being drunk.

"Let him be, we'll pick the baka saru up when we go to sleep" said Sanzo, he was as drunk as Gojyo was.

"If you say so," said Hakkai, picking up his can again.

"I never have been a demon," said Sanzo. Gojyo and Hakkai took sips.

"I never have been drunk before" Hakkai said happily. Gojyo and Sanzo took sips.

"I've never needed a youkai power limiter" said Gojyo. "Seeing that I am half-human, half-demon." Hakkai took a sip.

"I never wear a mask, figuratively and literally," Sanzo said. Hakkai smiled and took a sip.

"I never was always friendly," Hakkai said. Nobody took sips, though if Goku would have been conscious at the time he might have.

"That's a no brainer, his reverend isn't friendly to anybody, even to us! He called us his servants!" Gojyo said.

"That's not true," Hakkai argued. "He is nice when he wants to be."

"Rarely"

"Excuse me, but I'm right here, unless you believe I'm too drunk to hear you," said Sanzo, glaring at them.

"Whatever, anyway I never have gone demonic" Gojyo slurred slightly, the alcohol getting to him finally. Hakkai took a sip.

"Hey 'Kai? What do you look like anyway?"

"Pardon?"

"Whadda look like when ya take off your limiters?"

"Ah… I have longer hair, claws I guess, pointy ears, slitted eyes, vine and leaf-like tattoos all over my body."

"How many leaves do ya have?"

"I don't know, I never got time to count."

"How about we help ya."

"Eh?"

"Why would I want to help you people," interrupted Sanzo.

"You don't hafta if ya don't wanna" slurred Gojyo.

"Were you suggesting that I take off my limiters, so you could count how many leaf tattoos I have?" Hakkai restated.

"Yup," Gojyo answered.

"No, I can't jeopardize your safety," Hakkai said. "Wait… Are you drunk? I mean really drunk?"

"Yup," Gojyo giggled happily.

"But you didn't take that many sips."

"I've been drinking more when nobody was looking," Gojyo said, then he grabbed his head. "Oh boy, I'm gonna have the worst hangover ever."

"Idiot," muttered Sanzo.

Hakkai looked at Sanzo. "You're not drunk are you?"

"Yes I am, but unlike Redhead, I'm quiet."

"Oh dear, perhaps we should go to bed…" Hakkai suggested.

"Okay, let's do it" Sanzo, surprisingly, agreed. "Kappa, you can put the saru in his bed."

"Sure, whatever," muttered Gojyo, standing up shakily, picking up Goku and dragging him to their side of the room.

Sanzo got up and walked towards his bed. He stumbled and almost fell if Hakkai hadn't caught him.

"Let go," Sanzo growled drowsily.

"No, let me help you" Hakkai said, smiling. "It would be very humiliating for the Great Genjo Sanzo to fall flat on his face."

"…"

They slowly made their way to Sanzo's bed, when Sanzo's weight seemed to overpower Hakkai, and sent them tumbling onto Sanzo's bed.

Hakkai blinked a couple of times to assess the situation. He finally noticed he was under Sanzo, his back on the sheets, and Sanzo facing him. Hakkai also noticed that Sanzo was out cold and that he had one arm trapped in between them.

Hakkai tried to push Sanzo off but it didn't seem to work. "What have you been eating lately, dear Sanzo? Cement?" Hakkai questioned Sanzo, even if Sanzo couldn't hear him. "Gojyo? Could you help me out?"

Not getting an answer, Hakkai shifted slightly to see that Gojyo had dumped Goku unceremoniously on his bed. Gojyo then dumped himself on his own bed and was fast asleep. Hakkai sighed.

"Hopefully Sanzo doesn't take this the wrong way" he muttered, with his free hand, pulled off his monocle and turned off the light.

"I don't take this the wrong way at all," mumbled Sanzo.

The End

Silver Dragon: Um... About Hakkai's religion, I don't know, some say Catholic, some say Christian, I went with Catholic. Also, Kanan, she's either a girlfriend, or a lover, or Hakkai's betrothed,so I picked one of those. And the endingwith Sanzo and Hakkai,you can take it any wayyou want... But don't be mad. Review please!


End file.
